|Brigitte Bardot was one of the last desperate moves of the fast-fading wax museum|
It's gonna be a 4,000 square foot job in that underused space in the Eaton Centre.
I demand something far more modern and exciting and interactive.
An updated wax museum would let me storm in with my holographic Union-Jack emblazoned cricket bat and free Pierre Laporte from his evil FLQ kidnappers.
I'd have the opportunity to climb a virtual ladder and get Hans Marotte down from the cross on Mount Royal.
I'd be slamming tennis balls with an animatronic Raphael Nadal.
I want a knife-fight with a robot Sean Connery and won't stop stomping this desk until I get it.
The technology is there. I know because once in the 80s while shopping for a Swiss Army knife (yeah life was exciting before the Internet) at that old Eastern European guy's knife-sharpening place on Bleury below St. Catherine, I also looked into the sex shop next door.
They had a doll where you press a button and say your name and the sex doll would record your voice and then use that same recording of your voice to call your name back out when in use. Hearing your own voice calling out your name while having sex with a doll must've been really hot. I didn't buy it, of course, too expensive.
But that was back in the 1980s! Even back in those pre-historic times they had cool interactive technology and now they're still trying to get us to pay to see mannequins.
If I want to see motionless dummies, I'll stare in at the black-leather mini-skirted window display in Le Chateau window at Angrignon Mall thank you very much and not pay a cent!
|(Thx to HRo for finding these C.Poirier pics)|
The other wax museum opened 1935 in the Snow Coat area of Montreal.
It attracted religious tour buses with its stunning likenesses of Christian martyrs and other such exciting stuff.
Two Frenchmen who created the statues, Robert Tancrede and Albert Chartier, handed the keys over to the city in 1985 because even they found it boring beyond words. It's now a pharmacy and I recently overheard someone on the 80 bus saying that the owner plans to pop condos on top at the first possible opportunity.
The Parisian invaders are trying to make a few Eurobucks off us Kweebeck colonials by charging us to see mannequins that sort look like astronaut Julie Payette, Celine Dion, Roy Dupuis, Robert Charlebois, Guy Lafleur, Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie and Lady Gaga.
Great to see that the technology of the 1880s is finally here in Montreal.
Are buggy whips on sale at Walmart? Will the next big thing be irons that you heat on coal fire? Earmuffs! Gramphones! Mr. Watson come here I want to see you!
I'm boycotting this old stinkiness because I want modern high-tech entertainment thank you very much.
Let me interact with some robots dammit. I've been waiting for this since 1968. Let me have my robot fantasy. I want to rewrite history, do the stuff I was deprived by chronology of doing.